|
06:39 am
[Link] |
Leave me alone.
I'm seriously being forced to live a sober life for the next two months max!...... You've got to be fucking kidding me, doctor.
Drinking isn't a problem, I rarely ever drink anyways. No way, no how am I givin up weed... But I guess I can since I haven't had it in I don't know how many days. This is besides the point...My doctor said this should be my "wake up" call . Had I stayed in Florida and got worse, I could of died cause all my insides were so swollen. And that really scares the shit out of me.
I'm in complete deniel as of right now. I honestly don't have a fucking clue what's going on or what to expect. I'm starting to lose feeling in my right pinky and ring finger and I have a numb feeling in the back of my neck. I wouldn't be surprised if it's the medicine fucking my body up more then it already is. I just want to be normal again. THAT'S ALL I FUCKING WANT! I have an anxity attack every other day and my chest is so sore and my heart hurts. I'm not gunna lie, i'm fucking scared.
I don't know how to say thank you enough to my mother for putting up with me. I've been so rude and demanding these past 2 weeks and i'm just now realizing I need to do what these doctors are telling me to do. I don't need no ones help but my own mothers.
I'm glad I know that I do have SOME friends who actually care whats going on and keep in touch. I always have to find out whos real and who isn't the hard way. GOOD JOB FUCKING ASSHOLES!
No one is real anymore, i've even been told to my face i'm not either. Sooo fuck everything! Cause I honestly give up and don't give a shit.
What the fuck, man. PEACE!
Current Location: Groves, Texas
Current Mood:  angry
|
|
12:14 am
[Link] |
hahaha
kathy left her lj signed on.
hahaha
now i can lurk all the people from texas that are friends only.
we love you
-wes and vanessa
|
|
12:52 am
[Link] |
durka durka
i like me some bill!
|
|
03:46 am
[Link] | So im over here in Houston with my sister and chris...
Im going to Victoria today..nothing great tho....
uhm...i really miss patrick...he called me tonight and i didnt pick up..stupid me.I called back..but he was already asleep...I miss him so much..gosh..i wish i didnt have to miss him.
We never talk any more on the phone.I hate it.But ok
its like almost 4AM..
night
Current Mood:  sleepy
|
|
06:46 pm
[Link] | 
nuff said about it........
|
|
04:55 pm
[Link] |
Sleep sounds like a plan as of.....NOW
Well i stayed up on my cell phone till 3:40A.M last night..I got like 2 hours of sleep..maybe even less..Thank god today was a easy-go-day!!I Have alllll these effin test next week i have to take.Blah...20% of my grade they say...so thats sucks.And that tells me i have to study hard all next week for my test..Sucks..Oh well.Cody called yesterday from jacob's cell phone...I thought it was the dumbas jacob..but no...i called him back and it was cody.I asked cody why do you have to call me from jacob's cell....AND SO MUCH OF A FUCKEN FRIEND HE IS...this is what he said" I FORGOT YOUR NUMBER AND I DONT HAVE IT NO MORE"....!!!THANKS...ASS...Well i soon forgot about him after i got off the phone with him and his lame number.I just dont understand.We WERE bestfriends at one point..AND i know a lot of friends,boyfriends,girlfriends,and best friends who fight allll the fucken time ..and they still stick together and dont for get about SHIT about them...SO i just dont wanna talk to him no more.Im doing just fine with out talking to him.And beside's i have my sister more to talk to and also she's moving back with me.So there really is no point in fixing bull shit with cody..I just DONT CARE NO MORE..just like him!...and yeah people were telling me how he went and gave my ex-bestfriend nicole a hugeee hug and got her number and now calls!!!YOUR TO FUCKEN COOL CODY..LET ME FUCKEN TELL YOU....Any ways.This weekend is gonna be bad.Cant wait dood.I get to go out Friday,and Saturday my mom is going outta state..woot woot!Well im gonna go for now!I'll be in v*town next Friday to go see my sister walk the effin stage...Crazy dood...Any who..Bye kidds
Current Mood:  gloomy
|
|
04:49 pm
[Link] |
Awesome..
Ha...I just looked at balli's lj.....made my day.
Dumbass
*The End*
Current Mood:  amused
|
|
08:20 pm
[Link] | Well 2 more lame weeks till school lets out.Not even 2 weeks, Just 7 more school days.Wow.Cant effin wait.Today was pretty good.I guess.Im talking to sharif on aim right now!I love this kidd so much.I dont know..Me and my "best friend" cody brusso never talk as much as we use to.Its weird.I feel like i did all the fighting and messing up with him!I miss going to his house and fighting with him.I dont know.I know it has to deal with my boyfriend.But theres nothing i can do about that.And cody know's me best, and i know him best to!Put i dont know.Its what ever.Well im gonna go.
I just saw a pic of cody on james lj of cody?...makes me miss the kidd!
Bye kidds
Current Mood:  confused
|
|
02:58 pm
[Link] |
Welcome back...Welcome back.Welcome back.Welcome baccckkk
Yup im not at home..Im in Austin.My profile On Myspace is awesome now!I got New pics and every one thinks there hott!Thanks every one!Im talking to my love des.Shes so awesome.I miss my boyfriend like whoa.We stayed up talking til like 3:30 last night.Big long distance phone call.From Austin to the big ATL...WOW..!!lol..and no he does not live there ..gay ...lol.Yeah Well Any ways.Im gonna go for now.bye kiddo's
Current Mood: amused
|
|
09:52 pm
[Link] |
uh.?
I love the rain here tonight!The roads here are flooded like whoa!Its awesome.Today was ok i guess.My foot hurts so bad ..Because my mom ..I was gonna close my door..And i felt something pushing my door and she opens the door and i screamed so loud and i like flew up in the air and fell on my foot wrong..So yeah...well mmk..3 more stupid weeks of lame school!THANK YOU LORD!!!
Current Mood:  loved
|
|
05:54 pm
[Link] |
All in All....
Gah..this weekend was the best i could have ever asked for.I got into v-town around 10pm..??saturday..Went to nicole..And left with her and my boyfriend and all his friend.Stay the night with him and every thing.It took 9 months for us to say we loved each other.It was worth it.I loved it when he told me " i love you"...i swear it had to be the biggest thing to me.I miss already and it has not even been a week!I hope to see him again real soon!My poor thing got sunburned when him and all his friends went fishing....lol..he's so lame.He said thats what he will be doing every sunday now!!Bye
|
|
04:03 pm
[Link] |
I love him,I love him not,I love him........
Yes, I am off of grounding!Sweet.Im happy.And to make things even better to start it off,(being off grounding)Is that..im going to v*town saturday!WootWoot.Im going to nicoles house when i get into town,going to some thing with her,and then see whats going on down town...Cause im such a true mexican!!!!WHAT...lol...right..jk...Well the other night i stayed up talking on my cell till 4:30 A.M..i got like a hour and a half of sleep..It sucked like whoa..But who i stayed up with..My boyfriend..Was so worth my time.And i really didnt care.I fell a sleep during 3rd block on my backpack while a movie was going.I swear, that was the best power nap i have ever had in my life!And i had a red mark on my forehead lol ..look like a weed plant!lol..This chick at skool started to talk about me .And i sure did go off on her.I thought it was funny tho..And i thought i was done yelling at her..and when i turned around to walk off..you know what she said..lol she goes"Your acting like a lil 3rd grader "..i was like WHAT ..you think im a lil 3rd grader..and i got in her face like whoa and i was like ..lol..im about to fuck your teeth up more than they already are..lol..yeah it was rude..but i couldnt fight her in front of teachers...and i walked off again..and she was like ohh well your a freshmen..thats what makes up for it....and shes in my same grade as me to..lame..she just didnt know what to tell me..lol..soo i went in the class..and before lunch ..my english teacher was like..kathy..ok..heres the deal.I really dont want you to fight this lil girl because you can get a really big ticket,get kicked outta school for the rest of the year and every thing.And kathy..i like ya!lol..Im getting colored contacts!And i tiedied today in IPC..pink and black star!!!YOu already know kidd!.BYe
Current Mood:  satisfied
|
|
11:43 am
[Link] |
No school...wow..... :|
Yeah there is no school today.And there wasnt no school Friday either.Hum..Dont ask me why.This school is just lame like that.I have the house to my self.And iv been sitting at this fucken computer since 9a.m.And my ass hurts like whoa from sitting here.Yeah is it right for a so called "friend" to choose a guy over you?I dont think it is.The fact that im not like that..i think its just fucked up.If im with a guy i aleast ask my friends if they wanna come..ha..most the time i do..there always..nah its ok you go on ahead and have your fun..lol!!!I love you nicole!!!lmao...But what fucken mary did saturday night was just damn right lame..She said she was gonna come stay and we were gonna go out..But she thought humm " lets not call kathy and just sleep some where else tonight and lie to my parents where i am AGAIN"...well her step mom called over here last night and my mom picked up before i could.And the fucken cops pulled her over with this guy name doug...stupid..past curfew for her lil ass..So now she grounded...She came to my house and i was standing at the front door and i opened it and then half way up to my house..she truned around and left ...what the fuck is that shit..Bitch..fuck you!Like i have always said.You have bad taste in guys.Your fucken annoying as fuck when you come to school high.And your a fucken year younger then me.Yea..shes 14.And she fucken shows it like whoa.and i know im lame for saying this..but i HATE hanging out with people younger then me and dating people younger then me..I have no idea..but i feel like they dont understand me for some reason..In fact my whole life i feel like no one has ..but cody and patrick and nicole..there the only 3 people that i think understands me the most..and crazy jessy!I love you guys!.Gah i miss patrick.And i hate him for not calling.I called greg yesterday to see if he knew where the hell pats been..but he wasnt there?...i dont know what the fuck to do.I really dont wanna give up at all ....cause i think ..and i have no idea why its so hard to move on from him..!!.Last night i worte my sister a graduation letter.It was hard to write and re-read all of it.Im gonna go to v-town this weekend and take pics with her,gather up all the baby pics and shit and make some thing of it.Since i have no money to get her something.Its the thought that counts that i took time to think of her .Gah im gonna hate looking at her go up on the stage...I want my 2 best friends to be there with me that night to see my sister...Cody and nicole....this weekend me and matt are gonna try to plan a pool party!We do it every year..but this year with out the drama!!FUCK CHRIS CAMP!!BITCH...whoa i just poped my back..that was crazy ..from the top of my neck to the fucken bottom!!Man that felt good..Ha..well any ways..im gonna go for now and find something to eat.Be ready kidds for this weekend!Byekidds
Current Mood: chipper
|
|
10:22 pm
[Link] |
Fare Well my loved ones...
Well my fun has gotten cut to a close.It was fun while it lasted.Cause the rain didnt keep my mom for long.Cause shes Less then 30mins away.But its alright.I'll still go out..And its better to sneek out when my mom is home..the fact that ...i dont have to worrie about going back home ..not knowing if she's home or not...cause my mother is the sneekest little mother there is out there..lol..I just woke up like whoa..and got off the phone with blake,Im so board dood....And Mary said she would come stay the night..But just mark that thought out.She took off with a lame ass dood named doug..LAME AS FUCK...its what ever ..i hope she isnt planning to stay here at my house tonight..and if she does i hope she comes like before my mom gets home.Other wise my mom is gonna know there is something up.Any ways ..im gonna go lay back down and think about what im gonna do tonight.This is my last up date since im still"grounded".And I only had the computer while my mom and stepdad where gone..so yeah.So i guess i will talk to you kidds later on!Bye kidds.
I shuold be down in v-town next weekend..i think.Not sure.Call me if you wanna do something.cause i never know or have any thing planned out when i am in town. 1-361-648-2566..
DOOODDD.MY mom just called me and she's getting me TACO BELL MUUUGGGAAAAA....yes i use a "m" not a "n"!!!holla!!!<333
Current Mood: i have no idea what this means
|
02:57 pm
[Link] |
AWW YEAAH
Yeah so my mom calls.She ASKED ME if she could stay another night at the casino's tonight.I was like yes you can dear!...dood my mom is so lame.Im going to this party my friend meg is throwing tonight, and i think mary is going to stay the night with me tonight.So yeah my night is just made like whoa dood!!!Holla kidds!
Oh and yeah..This does mean im not going to v*town after all.But ill have fun for all you kidds out there .bye<333
Current Mood:  bouncy
|
11:25 am
[Link] |
While the rents are gone...thats all that really fucken matters.
Yeah my mom and stepdad left last night to the casino.Like always.Last night i went out around 11:20....20 mins before this lame houseparty/show...where all these effin bands were playing that i wanted to fucken see...but the shit ended at 11..but ppl stayed late...its what ever..well i was with this dood dale and his friend jab who picked me up..We drove around with nothing to do..The weather was awesome.Hard ass rain,lighting and everything in between.But i was scared as fuck because this dood jab..well his fucken truck had like no grip at all...he was just going 5mph while turning...and we still were fucking silding..well any ways.After that i called my friend blake up to see where the hell he was.And he was at the best place on earth ...that God has ever made in life kidds....Taco Bell!!He told me to go over there and so i did.And i jetted with him and his friend Greg.We went to some party ...a friend of blakes ..whos b-day it was..i dont know.The time fucken flew by like whoa..i thought it was like 1 ..it was already 2:13a.m when i looked at my phone.I was like damn..So Greg,Blake, and me were getting sleepy as fuck...so we jetted.They came to my house or what ever...and i didnt think they were gonna come in with me..but the dumbasses did.Ha.So we all came into my room and just laid there on my bed till like 6a.m....and thats how my night ended.And now im awake..and my mom still isnt home??...lame....bye kidds!
lol the highlight of the night...i still feel like a fucken dumbass like whoa..was when i got in Gregs truck...and he was eating taco bell..and i was like hey..and then i was like oh hey you have ...something on the side..and then i was like ohh fuck...my bad...lol his fucken lip was done 2 times..one on the left and one on the right..im such a fucken dumbass like whoa!!!lol...and his fucken rings were black..so hey!!!!
Current Mood:  okay
|
|
05:43 pm
[Link] |
Life is hard..and the little things make it even harder
Some times i just feel like giving up on every thing and every one.I hate ..and i mean i fucken HATE not having that "some one" else.Me and patrick are just over i guess now.Its been like 3 or 4 weeks...no fucken call.And no im not just mad at him for that but for other reasons.It just seems like there is no one out there no more.I dont wanna start anything here where i live..only ..and the fact because..im moving back home next year around thanksgiving.Im still grounded.I dont know when i will get off of grounding.School is so fucken lame.I hate it so much.But ..the way i get threw my day ..is when i think..1year..thats it..and im fucken outta here dood!!!I feel like shit tonight.My best friend cody is playing his 1st show ..and i cant even be there tonight.I love you cody!!And he knows i would be there if i lived there.
Any ways.Im not gonna lie.There is some one that I do like.But there stands no chance.So im just gonna sit back in the single world for now.Its what ever dood.
bye kidds
Current Mood: confused
|
|
03:54 pm
[Link] |
Gah...
Yeah im still alive.Iv been grounded like hard core like whoa.Cell got taken away..house phone,computer,going any where...ha i took my cell back tho!So today is like my only day to be online.So yeah.Nothing really has been going on much.Just a lot of studing and thats about it.Been more depressed then i have ever been in my life.But i guess its what ever ya know.Iv just had it with every one.But yeah im just doing this to let who ever reads this whats going on with me .Bye kidds
Current Mood: depressed
|
|
04:43 pm
[Link] |
HAPPY FUCKEN 4:20 KIDDS...
Yeah ...right....uhm well today was shitty..im tired of all these girls who think they can talk shit and then when it all comes down and you go up to them..or they come up to you trying to talk there mess..just.. its all lame.Im glad i didnt fucken stick that stupid bitch in her face..the only then that kept me back was 1:We were right in front of a cam in the hall and there was no one in the halls any more.2:We were in front of the office..So yeah.Its what ever ..i just know there is gonna be some shit gonna go down at skool later on in the week..what ever dood.I took some pics today but i gotta scan them hoes later when i get the pics done, and nickie didnt bring the dig cam today..so that made me unhappy.But she said she would bring it to skool..so yeah..I feel a sleep last class.For like 30 mins ..I had never laughed so hard at my algebra teacher in my life..when i still think about what my teached did..lmao..its so fucken funny dood..you just had to of been there.I couldnt stop laughing, so every one around me was like your sleepy ..go to sleep..so i did what i was told and slept pretty damn good.Any ways every one is making a bigg ass deal outta 4:20!!DAMN YOU..YOU POT HEADS!!!!lmao..im just kidding kidds.!!Have a good one ..ohh and Happy Brithday Hitler!!!
bye kidds!
Current Mood:  stressed
Current Music: ---
|
|
04:46 pm
[Link] |
I hate how you lie ......
Yeah..people who lie are lame.I cant stand people who are like that.This chick is going around saying she got a black eye from her now ex-boyfriend..when she put this black stuff under her eye ..haha almost looks like my make up.lol and my friend meg was gonna lick her finger and rub it under her eye and go"Whhhhat hhappend" lol.to see if it was make up..but that chick back off and was like NO DONT it hurts...bitch..i know what a black eye looks like and feels like..Iv had some my self from the pits..but not getting hit by no effin lame guy..and then she tryed to get loud with every one that was around her ..so me and meg were like hell no..so we jetted and was late to our last class..Today was pretty easy i guess.Nothing really happend.Just another lame day at school.I broke down hard last night..I just dont know what to do with my life right now.Im just lost in it right now.Ya know.I havnt had a true boy friend in like what almost 6 or 7 months.And im taking it to far.I want some one bad.But i know they dont want me.Thats alright.Were still friends..thats still good ...??right?..Well any ways im gonna go ..bye kids
Current Mood: blank
Current Music: like always...the used
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
the_star_fell's journal